Since social media became part of our lives, our behavior has drastically altered, especially our attitude toward parenting. Unlike our parents, the new generation of parents share everything about their kids on social media, including sonograms, births, first steps, potty training and vacations
Last week I saw a book on the shelves called "How to Make your Baby an Internet Celebrity." The book offered some helpful advice for parents. For instance, how to create a profile for your baby, how to choose the right Instagram filter for a proper effect, et cetera. Imagine that baby growing up in a family where parents are talking about his/her followers and likes on Facebook and Instagram. The more parents talk about the feedback and likes, the more kids think that social media feedbacks are important.
If you search Youtube using the phrase "am I pretty or ugly?" you will find many kids asking strangers this question. Kids who think that feedback from social media is important and should be taken seriously, can easily ask such questions on Youtube. When you look at the comments, you see how cruel and harsh they are. You can imagine how one's self-esteem is shattered by these ruthless comments. However, self-esteem is not only damaged by rejection, but also harmed by over-approval. If a child is constantly approved by others, he/she might become addicted to such approval. The social network's liking system is based on this principle: "approval addiction."
Approval addiction and low self-esteem are indirect, but in the long run, are serious consequences of starring kids. Meanwhile, there are some direct consequences of parents sharing children's videos and images online. You must have come across the many videos starring kids in social media. In these videos, there is a moment when the children realize that they are being recorded; you can see boredom, the lack of meaning or the feeling of being cheated in their glances. This is a clear sign that there is something wrong. Let's empathize a little. Let's say you had a great time with a friend. The next day you realize that whatever you talked about was recorded and shared on various social media platforms and everybody laughed at you. What would your reaction be? I am sure you'd say ''somebody will pay for this!'' Then you'd start questioning the genuineness of your relationship. You'd most likely never want to talk to that person ever again. But just like you, kids might feel cheated and they often react with anger.
Another thing that can harm your children by sharing your children's images and videos is setting them up as targets for bullying. Last week, a video was published on social networks: a 10-year-old boy doesn't want to do homework because he can't write the letter "E". He was recorded by his mom, because he was crying. We have frequently seen such videos recorded and shared by parents or teachers. First, it looks funny or cute. However, as adults we often forget that kids also have a social life, and we forget that peer pressure at school or on the street can be tough sometimes. Such videos or images can harm his/her reputation. And this could haunt them for the rest of their life, because nothing is deleted on the internet. When your child starts school or grows up, even when he applies for a job, those videos and images are going to be there, and don't think it won't be noticed.
Sharing your child's images and videos can create another danger. It may sound too far removed, but there is an unpleasant reality called "pedophilia." Pedophiles hunt the Internet for images and videos of children they find attractive. They even make an archive with the photographs they find. Nowadays, thanks to social platforms, pedophiles can easily stalk kids. Criminal psychologist Nuray Mum Mert stated that sometimes parents think that their kids seem so cute with makeup, in a swim-suit or naked, so they think that everyone will feel the same way. But unfortunately, these images can be attractive for pedophiles, especially if the child poses like an adult.
We have to realize that social media is not a safe environment for our children. In social media, our children are vulnerable. They could easily be targeted by bullying, pedophiles or a great many dangers that we are not even aware of. In order for us to protect our children from abuse and prevent them from falling into wrong hands, or to raise them with high self-esteem, we have to pay attention to how and what we share about our children on the Internet. We have to teach them how to use social media so they can be safe.
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