As I mentioned in my previous article, the recovery from the trauma caused by the February earthquakes that shook Türkiye would not be easy for those who were directly or indirectly affected by the catastrophe. In this article, I would like to explore this topic further and discuss the "secondary trauma" caused by the disaster.
Trauma can be defined as an event that overwhelms a person's emotional capacity, causing them to readjust their perception of reality. The earthquake we experienced recently not only caused physical damage to buildings but also shook our sense of reality, trust, belonging, competence, comfort, and mortality. We were forced to adapt to a new reality, both directly and indirectly.
Secondary trauma refers to the distress experienced by individuals who witness a traumatic event indirectly, such as through media exposure, and may develop similar symptoms as those who experienced it directly. Exposure to graphic or sensationalized images in written or visual media can inundate individuals with unrealistic or unhealthy information, exacerbating their trauma. Consequently, they may struggle to resume their daily life routines.
Let's think about this disaster that we endured. Someone who is trapped under the rubble may get cold or have muscle aches because of frigid temperatures. The mind of someone who has never experienced an earthquake but constantly consumes the news or sees images related o the quake on social media may react after a while as if he/she has been under the rubble as well. This person may feel motionless, half-dead, painful and lethargic as if weighing a ton. The person can get very cold too.
In cases where secondary trauma has a significant impact, as, in this example, it's helpful to create a distinction between the event and yourself. One way to do this is through daily self-suggestions, which can remind you that the earthquake happened elsewhere and that you did not experience it personally.
Some people are not very affected even though they experienced the earthquake, some are very affected even though they did not experience it. If the emotion you feel goes away after a while, this emotion is most likely related to today. But if it lasts for a long time, part of the emotion you're experiencing is not related to the earthquake, it's just an emotion triggered by the earthquake. Although we did not experience the earthquake, if our emotions are very intense, the first place we look for answers should be our childhood. How so?
Think about the news you watched and the information you learned about the earthquake. Not every information or scene shakes you. Some moments affect more than others. For example, the scene you are most impressed with is the baby who was under the rubble. Find the emotion that moves you the most in this scene. Let's say the fear of dying alone. Since the fear of dying alone touches something in your story, this scene distracts you. The scene where someone else is affected is perhaps the scene of the house being demolished. This scene also has a meaning in this story. So what you're going to do is this:
- Find out which scene/news affected you the most. Let it be the moment when the house is demolished.
- Find out what emotion compels you in this scene. Let it be a feeling of insecurity.
- Investigate who and how one might have experienced that emotion as a child. There are memories and places where I felt insecure as a child. What could these be?
As you find the connections, the sense of the earthquake diminishes, however, memories that you suppressed in childhood for some reason resurface. The healing comes after feeling and naming the emotion of those memories.
You may not think of a link at first. You can use the "Emotion Freedom Technique" to reduce the emotion that compels you. After a few weeks, different memories/images will come to your mind.
It is hard for me to move on with my life while someone else is suffering.
Have you felt bad and guilty about avoiding the terrible things that have happened to others? If your answer is yes, this situation in which you feel guilty because you did not experience the earthquake or did not die even though you lived is known as “survivor's guilt syndrome.”
This sense of guilt is associated with thinking that we have the possibility to do what could not be done and change the fate of those who died, and to feel an obligation to help beyond what we can be held responsible for. Although it may seem absurd that we can predict and change the direction of someone else's life and what will happen to them, the person cannot control the feelings of guilt and shame.
In this case, first of all, if feelings such as guilt-shame are very intense, naming them with lots of labels will allow the emotion to be cleared after a while. If we express an emotion, if we name it, after a while, our brain throws that emotion out of its system.
For example, you might say "I'm feeling embarrassment right now" or "experiencing embarrassment." You can repeat this exercise every day until your feeling calms down.
When we are born, our minds are empty and we get an idea of both ourselves and the world through the relationships we form between the ages of 0-6. During this period, the child perceives himself/herself as responsible for what is going on in the world and may think that everything is happening because of him/her, or for him/her. For example, if someone dies, he or she immediately thinks they did something "mischievous" and that person died because of this. If his/her mother or father feels bad one day or gets sick, he/she may think that they feel that way because of him/her.
A healthy parenting attitude helps break this perception, and the child learns that he/she can control some things in life and that some things are outside his/her control. When parents feed misperception through their behavior and words, he/she experiences intense feelings of guilt in adult life, but cannot make sense of it.
If you cannot calm your guilt and it lasts for days or weeks, your reaction may not be relevant today. The feeling of guilt may have a root in your own childhood story. It helps explore where you were made to feel guilty as a child, by whom, and how. You can ask yourself from time to time. Sometimes the response won't come right away, but you'll start to notice after a few weeks.
You can engage in auto-suggestion to change the idea of guilt and responsibility felt as a child. For example, “It's normal for me to move on with my life when other people are experiencing difficulties. It is normal for me to improve myself, to take care of myself.” “It is normal for me not to suffer as much as they do when others are suffering.” “I cannot end the suffering of others, I can end my own suffering.” Repeat these auto-suggestions daily for three to six months. After a while, your guilt feelings will gradually subside.
